I hit up the Picasso’s Pizza on Union road, which judging by the inside was either the original or one of the first. I can’t believe I had almost forgotten, but we had a Picasso’s in Lockport when I was growing up. My parent’s never liked it so they didn’t order it and I never remembered having it. Sometime in the Mid 2000’s it shut down and became Masterpiece Pizza, which I never tried, and is now aguacate, the only Mexican restaurant within 30mins of Lockport. Gotta give them credit for seeing the gap and swooping in. So there is your history lesson. But this shit isn’t about chimichangas. You all voted it highly and I expect great things. I’ve always been the Black Sheep in the family on pizza preference, so let’s see if I got screwed all those years not trying a Picasso’s that sat just down the street because mom and pop dig the vilest of sweet sauces. 2+20oz=$6.88, which is a little high but not terrible. Smoke if you got ‘em.

Come on, man. How are you just going to hit me with these slices? I wasn’t even really in the mood for pizza today, but this is bananas. These may be the most visually appealing slices I’ve ever gotten. Piping hot pizza was filling my car with garlic and cheese fumes. I haven’t been so initially pumped to try a slice in a while. Pizza life got me jaded.

The pepperoni are at the top of their class. Varying thickness and length. Perfectly charred edges with a chewy center. Layered heavily. These are close to perfect. 1 or 2 more on the other slice and it’s a straight up A+, and that’s getting real anal.

These came out really great, so fuck it I’m just keeping them.

Picasso’s cheese, like their pepperoni, is near perfection. It was salty and gooey and there was a ton of it covering the slice it. Almost perfectly browned, but maybe a touch more to hit literal perfection. They also shake what I assume is garlic-parmesan mixture on top as a finishing touch. I thought that was genius. What kind of sicko wouldn’t want that? Plus it just looks bomb.

Seriously, look at that stretch. Take me now, Cheesus. I’m ready.

Just to give you an idea of quantity, despite the shit-quality photo. This is a cheese blanket that somehow folded under the slice and covered the bottom. It didn’t slide from the top down because there was still cheese up there, too. Everything I’ve learned about pizza physics has taught me this isn’t possible. I’ll spend the rest of my life picking up the pieces of my shattered mind. At least a week

These photos suck a little because I took them when I got back to my place and the lighting in my car was awesome, which I couldn’t really tell at the time. Picasso’s sauce is bit of a miss for me, unfortunately. I mean that in the context that everything else thus far has been superb. It is distinctively sweeter than average and they have a little “sauce char” situation going on (see Imperial’s review for clarification). It was by no means bad! Herby, and laid down heavily. Admittedly. I was a little bummed out because everything else was edging on perfection for my palate, but it seems Piccaso and I disagree on our sauce preferences. I’ll never understand you charcoal eating bastards.

Picasso’s dough is excellent. The bottom is checkered with varying degrees of doneness which provides a huge flavor profile. It had the ideal chew and was right in middle cut of thickness between NY style and Avenue Pizza, leaning just a little thicker than dead center. I tend to prefer a hard crispiness on the bottom (see Bob & John’s), ideally with some flour or a little cornmeal. That would have shot this into the upper A’s, but on the whole, preparation H feels good. Read that back to me, Petunia.

Dough🥖: (A-) Different notes and textures in every bite.
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Cheese🧀: (A/A+) A stretchy stringy combo of hot mozz and parm.
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Sauce🥫: (B+) Not AS sweet as some I’ve had, but still distinctively so. Sauce Char es no bueno.
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Pepperoni🍖: (A/A+) 2-3 more on that other slice and it’s literally a 100% score here.
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Overall🍕: (A)

Paint me impressed, Picasso. These were outstanding. Some of the best, which I had a feeling would be the case the moment I opened the box. I recommend everyone try Picasso’s at some point if you have any interest in the wild world of Buffalo pizza. If you enjoy your sauce a little sweeter and dig the char, call off work tomorrow and make a pilgrimage to what might be your new favorite. You’re going to be in rough shape anyway after the Pat’s game. God I hope we don’t fuck this up. In Tyrod we trust. Thanks for dishing out what I think are definitively some of the city’s finest, Picasso’s! Go Bills!