Do to the instinctive fear of looking like a weird-o, I pull these from the web when possible. As you may have guessed…this is one of those instances. Thank god we’re past this. It was a beautiful day downtown, and I headed to Prima Pizza & Pasta for some slices. Located near Chipp on Pearl, its got a beautiful storefront and a nice little interior setup. I got a “Sicilian” slice and a regular slice with a fountain drink for $6.75. Not bad, but a little pricier than most.

I’m not really gung-ho from the start. The regular slice is kind of small and looks undercooked. The Sicilian slice looks like a brick of dough that I instantly regretted ordering. I’ll make a note on that later, but for the sake of these reviews, of course, we’re focusing strictly on the regular slices.

…but seriously, that thing is a monstrosity and I’m ashamed to have it on my plate.

Ok, so this thing needed to do some hard time in the oven. The guy put it in for a warm-up, and by the time I got done paying, it was back out again. The cheese pulled, but it kind of “chunked” apart. The flavor was ok, but nothing worth note. It was a little grainy in my mouth, too. I liked that they sprinkled some herbs on the top (jah-mercy), but that doesn’t really count toward cheese score. So far…not great.

The pepperoni is Prima’s best asset. Very spicy, which in pepperoni terms means I could actually taste the spice, and nicely charred. Really skimping with only 4 though…

The sauce was just ok. Thick and velvety, but it the acidity was all I was getting. I’m rocking some hard acid reflux as I write this. Good distribution, but quantity isn’t super important when you’re not digging it.

This dough is damn near raw. Most undercooked I’ve had. If I weren’t reviewing and actually was making an effort to improve the experience, I would have asked to have it put back in…indefinitely. That is a floppy slice. If you’re looking to perform, you can’t be coming out floppy. Everybody knows that. Now Let’s hit it with a little ghetto gospel.

 

Dough🥖: (D-) Almost raw.
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Cheese🧀: (C-) Chunky, grainy, and coagulated.
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Sauce🥫: (C+) Very acidic.
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Pepperoni🍖: (B) Great flavor and a nice kick of spice but far too few.
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Overall🍕: (C-/C)

Overall I was unimpressed with Prima. I had seen and heard good things about the place, none of which I experienced when I went for lunch. Easily could have been an off day, but maybe not. With all the options downtown for lunch, for me, this wouldn’t warrant a stop, even for a quick meal. Also, and I have to note it, that Sicilian slice was the grossest pizza I have ever eaten, bar none. I could barely swallow the first few bites that I went for, purely out of the love for the game. The rest was trashed. I don’t know who is ordering that. If you’re looking for a slice that will fill you up for 2-4 days, this might be for you. Strictly a dough block. You could knock one of those out and ride the goddamn wagon train west. Save yourself from limiting out on bison meat. Anyhow, that was #20, and I’ve really appreciated everyone’s support for my newfound hobby/project here. Thanks for all of you who have stuck with it so far!